


am i real?

by angstgremlin



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Panic Attacks, This is just 400 words of ranboo having a panic attack and overthinking, all i know of today's events are from twitter and tumblr, i haven't even watched any streams, in the panic room because this is all i can think about right now, no editing we die like everyone will tmrw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:13:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28583307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstgremlin/pseuds/angstgremlin
Summary: Ranboo sat, curled up in the corner, knees to his chest, in his panic room. Crying obsidian dripping onto the floor. The jukebox in the middle playing a tune he couldn’t hear.Are you real?
Comments: 19
Kudos: 142





	am i real?

**Author's Note:**

> I have not watched any of todays streams bc i was at play rehersals. I come back to the discord server im on in chaos and twitter going insane. I don't care about spoilers so i gleamed what i could from twitter and tumblr, found a two minute clip of ranboo having a panic attack and hallucinating, and wrote for twenty minutes. I also did not reread this or edit in the slightest so if you see a mistake, no you didn't. 
> 
> I have nothing more to say, so pls enjoy!
> 
> TW! Graphic depiction of a panic attack.

Ranboo sat, curled up in the corner, knees to his chest, in his panic room. Crying obsidian dripping onto the floor. The jukebox in the middle playing a tune he couldn’t hear.

His memory book was gone.

His friends don’t trust him.

He doesn’t know who to trust.

Ranboo’s arms shook as he covered his face. Tears threatening to spill. 

Nowhere was safe. Even here wasn’t safe. The doorway could sport someone at any point.

The water masked the sounds of anyone inside. It also masked the sounds of anyone outside.

But luckily, the water also masked his already muffled sobs.

“I didn’t betray anyone”

_ Are you so sure about that? _

_ You wouldn’t remember if you did.  _ The voices in his head told him. Most sounding like Dream. Others morphing to sound like other people.

_ You betrayed everyone. _ Tubbo seemed to say.

_ Your a liability.  _ A voice too similar to Fundy told him.

_ Can we even trust you?  _ An oddly Tommy-like person questioned.

“I can be trusted.” Ranboo shot back.

_ Oh yeah? _

_ You can’t prove that. _

_ For all they know you’re planning on betraying them all and can’t even remember. _

“People trust- they trust me.” Ranboo argued, voice cracking angrily. 

_ Can they trust you? _ _  
_ _  
_ _ Can you even trust yourself anymore? _

He shivered even more, the cold, brutal walls closing in on him. They were too close. They weren’t close enough. He wasn’t safe he wasn’t safe he wasn’t safe.

_ Your not safe with anyone. _

_ Nobody is safe around you. _

_ Is anyone safe anymore? _ _  
  
_

“It’s… It’s going to be alright. Everyone is going- going to be  _ fine _ .” Ranboo sobbed.

_ You can’t count on that. _

_ Dream and Techno are going to destroy everything. _

_ Nobody is safe anymore. _

“They wouldn’t hurt anyone though.”

_ They already have.  _

_ Tubbo, Tommy, and Quackity only have one life left. _

_ Fundy only has two. Karl only has two.  _

_ How much longer until they lose all of them like Wilbur and Schlatt. _

“But- but they were evil. Only the bad guys died.”

_ Not all stories have happy endings. _

_ Sooner or later someone has to die. _

_ They weren’t always evil. _

_ Are you evil? _

“I’m not evil. I’m not going to hurt anyone.” 

_ You might. _

_ How much longer until you lose a life. _

_ Maybe you already have and don’t remember. _

“I wouldn’t forget that…”

_ You wouldn’t know that. _

_ Your memory book is gone. _

_ You can’t trust yourself. _

“I can’t…. I can’t trust myself.”

_ You don’t know what’s real anymore. _

“What’s real?”

_ What if nothing is real. _

_ Your friends might be figments of your imagination. _

_ Are you even real? _

“I… I’m real…”

“Right?”

_ Are you real? _

_ Are you real? _

_ Are you real? _

_ Are you real? _

_ Are you real? _

“Am I real?”   
  


He curled up even tighter onto himself, and sobbed.

**Author's Note:**

> I write for myself and not for validation, but kudos and comments make my day so pls consider leaving some! Thank you!!!


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